I have wanted to start a blog for quite some time now, but I think the time wasn't right before. I was still in the middle of the deepest part of my battle and I think instead of being optimistic about winning, I would have written what would have been a spiraling, sinking, loss. I refrained from a blog, turning my desires to express my feelings in another way. I was convinced that writing was the answer, but didn't really know what to write or where to write. I started an online journal, but that didn't satisfy my need to get my feelings out as I was the only one to read it. (Who knows, maybe I'll be the only one to read this!)
A few months ago, I went to a meeting with a lady who has a very popular blog out right now and she talked about taping into our creativity. Well, I've never felt I was creative (and still don't really), but she said something that caught my attention. She mentioned that everyone has something creative they do and she listed off several things. One of them was writing. I thought about that for quite some time. When I was in high school, I was convinced that I was going to be a writer. I took a creative writing class and my teacher liked my work so much she encouraged me to take one of my pieces and turn it into a children's story, telling me that she would help me get it published. I turned her down. I was a senior and too busy to add anything else to my already crammed schedule. Since then, I've always had stories running through my mind....silly, I know. But I never wrote anything down.
At the time of that meeting a few months ago, I had a story that I was developing in my mind that I felt was pretty good. That night, I decided to start writing it down. Wow! As I talked with my husband about my story, he gave me some really good suggestions, and I've since revised my original idea into something even better. The best thing about it is that I have taken my own feelings and experiences and put them into this story. This has been the best therapy for me! It makes me happy to write this story, and even though I already know the beginning, the middle, and the end, developing the little details have been so fun and uplifting for me!
One set back for me, though...I started this story with the idea of someday publishing it. I let some of my family read a small part of it and they seemed to like the premise of the story. So, I allowed one other person to read it....well, that didn't go so well. I am embarrassed that I felt so confident in my idea that I allowed someone to read into my personal thoughts. I started to sink a little again, but then I had an epiphany of sorts. This story of mine is just that...mine. It is my therapy. Maybe its not right for others, but it is helping me. It is helping me get through some of the things I have bottled up for a long time. In helping my characters solve their problems, I am in turn helping myself.
I'm not an Oprah Winfrey fan, but I have seen some of her shows in years past. One of them has stuck in my mind for a long time. She talked about keeping a Gratitude Journal. Everyday, write something you are thankful for and it can't be the exact same things over and over again. Maybe it starts out with the general stuff- I am thankful for family, I am thankful for friends, I am thankful for food, etc. But I found, when I did mine, I had to look for things to be thankful for. It really wasn't hard and I begin to look at my life a little differently than I had.
If you like to write, do it. Write a story, or start a journal getting all your feelings down on paper, or at least write a Gratitude Journal. If writing isn't your thing, try creating something. Being creative helps you feel a sense of accomplishment. There's lots of things that can be called creativity- painting, planting a garden, rearranging your family room, writing a poem, playing a musical instrument, flower arranging, and the list goes on and on. Try to do something creative everyday even if it is something small. Then, don't forget to enjoy the feeling of accomplishment!
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